Over the years, I have tuned pianos for a few Joels, and have concluded that, if you want your next baby boy to be a success name him Joel. Joels usually do well in life. Just look at Pastor Joel Osteen or Joel Grey (PHOTO), beloved star of the musical Cabaret. I had occasion to meet Joel Grey and was surprised to learn he is an equally famous photographer. Joels are over achievers! Of course, the first Joel we know of is the the prophet who lived about 800 years before Christ in Judah. He wrote the Book Of Joel, so short, it's barely a pamphlet, and it not only made the Jewish Tanakh, but, also the Christian Old Testament. Talk about syndication! Michael Angelo also painted Joel on the ceiling of the Sisting Chapel, bypassing many other prophets who wrote bigger books. Joel had some publicist!
According to the United States Census Bureau Joel is a fairly popular boy's name. It, of course, is of Hebrew origin. It means: Jehovah Is The Lord. In modern times it means: Joel is the boss. The really BIG boss. Look high enough up in any large corporate structure and there is always a Joel. In the halls of commerce Joel is equal to Elvis or Liza. No title or last name needed. The underlings speak it in reverent tones. "Has Joel approved this?" "This directive comes right from Joel."
I decided to test the power of the name Joel. I would walk into a big department store and bring a small purchase to the courtesy desk. "This will be going on sale in about two weeks," I'd say, "but, I'm a friend of Joel in cooperate and he said to tell you it was ok to give me the 15% off today." It never failed. When checking into a chain hotel like a Hilton I'd say, "Did Joel from corporate remember to call and request a room upgrade for my wife and I?" Often we got suite for the price of a room. Several summers ago I was walking the boardwalk at Ocean City New Jersey on an evening just after a small hurricane had hit. I noticed a TV news crew from a major Philadelphia station setting up to do a clip to run live on the eleven o clock news. I went several blocks down the boardwalk and started telling groups of teenage girls to go up to the news van and tell the crew that Joel said to put them on live to give their impressions of the storm. After a while I walked back up by the van and stood in a crowd of folks watching the crew set up. From this vantage point I could hear the anchor woman and camera guy asking the girls if they were sure this is what Joel wanted. About a dozen excited teens assured them that this was what Joel himself said. The anchor woman, still doubting, called the station headquarters on her cell phone. She asked whomever answered her call, "Do we have a Joel? We do. I don't suppose he's there now." I guess the person on the other end of the line informed her that Joel was too important to be working at 10:45 at night. The anchor woman sighed and yelled to the camera crew, "we'd better put the girls on." I had just programed the news. I smiled. There's always a Joel.
